How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
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