Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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