Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You left your phone here
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