His pubic hair was longer than his dick
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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