I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
