I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Randomize
