How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
