Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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