Dual....:-)
ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
