you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
