What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Sober January is a disaster.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
