Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize