If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
