i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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