So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
We are all done wearing pants today
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
