oh god the rape fog is back!
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
