I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
