It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
