Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
