So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
