apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
