that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
