Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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