i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
