You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
