Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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