I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
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