May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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