are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
babies were throwing up all over the place
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
