Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
