Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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