Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
