it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
