Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize