Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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