Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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