My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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