I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize