at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
