OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
