Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
