Kiss
Puke
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
