Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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