No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
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