I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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