Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Randomize
