big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
