but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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