Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
