I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Duck Duck Cougar?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
